Such projections must be heresy

GOP objects to Legislative Research’s numbers

By The Mercury

“What’s with those guys in the Legislative Research Department? Don’t they know we’re in charge around here?”

“What do you mean? And who’s the ‘we’ you’re talking about?”

“First things first. The ‘we’ is Republicans — make that Republicans of the conservative persuasion. The ‘they’ is legislative research and, well, almost everyone else. And last week they — Legislative Research — came out with some idiotic notion that Gov. Sam Brownback’s tax plan is going to gouge a $782 million hole in the state budget by 2018? It’s heresy, that’s what it is.”

“Well, isn’t it their job to crunch the numbers so legislators can have the best information available when considering taxes, budgets and the like? It’s a nonpartisan agency, you know.”

“Nonpartisan is just another word for liberal. And their job is to make the governor and the majority party look good. What you have to remember is these clowns in legislative research are the same people who a year ago warned that the governor’s budget would leave the state short $2.5 billion in six years. And they were wrong.”

“Well, to be fair, only a year has gone by… and the governor and his pals are scrambling to make up a shortfall of more than $200 million that they created with last year’s tax cuts.

“Whose side are you on? There’s no such thing as a tax that can’t be cut. But let’s get back to the Legislative Research Department. “

“OK.”

“They’d better watch out.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because they’re forgetting who they’re messing with.”

“You mean ‘whom’ they’re messing with.”

“Whatever.  I’ve got four words for them.”

“And those are…”

“ ‘Senate moderates’ and ‘constitutional amendment.’ ”

“Huh?”

“If they keep messing with the governor and the conservative majority, the governor and the conservative majority will mess back. Last year Senate moderates messed with the governor, and now they’re gone. The courts have now messed with the governor, and they’re gonna be gone.”

“You sound pretty sure of yourself.”

“I am. We’re gonna see that those liberal judges get a dose of conservative justice, that’s what we’re gonna do. Those judges think they know the Constitution better than we do. By the time we’re done with them, they won’t know hereto from therein.”

“Is all this wise? I mean, don’t you want a judicial system that citizens look up to?”

“Heck no. We want judges that look up to the Legislature. As for Legislative Research, all we ask is that they drop the shortfall nonsense and start talking about surpluses.”

“But surpluses take revenue, and you’re…”

“Be careful now… You know what happens to heretics.”









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