Pondering life, death

By Bryan Richardson

I’ve been thinking a lot about life and death recently. Let me start off by saying that existence is awesome. I can’t even imagine all the reasons I could not be existing.

I drive every day, fly on a plane every once in a while, exercise from time to time and do a bunch of other things that people have died doing. I feel fortunate I’ve made it this far in my life journey.

We all have the same tale. At one point, we were conceived. Then, we were born. The birth process is amazing. I’m not talking on a physical level but the mental aspect.

I’m child-free, so I don’t know what makes people ultimately decide to want children. From the outside looking in, it’s a very arrogant act.

Think about it. It’s a very powerful statement to life that you and another person are capable of raising somebody who isn’t awful.

Your parenting skills will be the catalyst for shaping another human life into a presentable form.

Regardless of the life circumstances that face you and that child, you’re essentially going all in with your chips to bet on your child being at least adequate at life.

Somehow, people all around the world are constantly planning to have a child. I’m not confident in my ability to raise myself many days. I’ve bought underwear just to avoid washing on more than one occasion. How sad would it be for me to raise a child?

Right now, my responsibility in life starts and ends with me. I have people I care about and do things for, but I technically could stop whenever I wanted. It’s my life. I can do what I want.

My belief is that we get one life to live, which makes that life especially important. Yet, I have this nagging feeling that I don’t actually want to live a long life.

I want to live for a while but not too long. I don’t actually know what I would consider too long. It just seems like one day I’ll go, “Yep, I’ve lived a good life. I can die at any point now.”

Basically, I would want it to happen at an age where I’m not young, but still kind of sad that I died at that age.

Nobody is allowed to be sad at my funeral, though. It’s one of the conditions for showing up to my going-away party. Some people have a guest book. I’ll have non-sadness contracts to be signed.

There are a number of different beliefs on what happens when you die. Some believe in an afterlife while others don’t. There’s also a number of ways people view an afterlife, but they generally involve Heaven or Hell as destinations.

Heaven seems like the place you’d want to be, but I’m not sure what it’s like. That’s probably because I’ve never died before. I also haven’t talked with anybody who’s dead to confirm any heavenly details.

Some people like to say their deceased loved ones become guardian angels. They remain with you in spirit. They look down on you from Heaven. It’s a very comforting thought.

I would want my loved ones to think the same thing when I die. However, that’s probably not going to be the case.

It’s not that I have a disbelief in the concept. I’m just awful at contacting people I love in my current living state. I love them but not enough to call often.

I talk to a member of my immediate family once a week for a “Hello, I’m alive” chat. Just one member, whether it be my mom, dad or sister. I’m not even the one who calls. One of them calls me.

I assume the heavenly version of me wouldn’t have this emotional deformity, but I don’t know that for certain. I don’t know too much with certainty about life and death.

Life is precious though, so live it well and fully, and don’t let people take your joy. Have a happy Sunday.

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